Utah Turns 21, Sneaks Into Bar

Chief Snow Junkie March 11, 2009 0


Utah may have the best snow on earth, but it’s a nightmare for a good old fashioned drunk until now. Get your drinking pants on. Utah is doing away with some of their wacky restrictions. No more private clubs. No more Zion Curtain. You don’t know about the Zion Curtain?   

“For restaurants that serve alcohol, the bill would do away with the so-called “Zion Curtain,” a glass barrier that servers must walk around to serve drinks to patrons. Under the proposed changes, bartenders would be able to pass a drink to a patron across the bar.”  — Salt Lake City Tribune

But wait, we’re still talking about Utah, right? Mixing a drink and serving it like any other bar in America sounds a little too San Francisco for our Mormon friends.   

New restaurants would still need a separate area for mixing drinks, away from the view of children, while existing restaurants would be grandfathered.  — Salt Lake City Tribune

Because everyone knows that watching T.G.I.Friday’s® bartenders churn up Mudslides® transforms children into raging alcoholics. That’s just science folks. If only there was a mother of two teenagers who could better explain the danger.    

“Our family values would be competing with a social norm that glamorizes alcohol,” said Kris Kimball, a mother of two teen children. She said the blenders and maraschino cherries “look kind of tantalizing” to children. “I’m not concerned with them ordering a drink. I’m concerned … about them being in an environment where they witness the mixing [and consumption],” she said. “It’s scary. It’s bombarding them.  — Salt Lake City Tribune

Yes, it is a scary world, Mrs. Kris Kimball. First your kids are watching drinks being poured. Then they’re eating maraschino cherries. Next thing you know…

Two mormons boys after sharing a Pabst Blue Ribbon

Two mormons boys after sharing an appletini

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